Has everyone had a nice break this past week?  I just want to remind you all to finish reading Bleak House, sign up on the young writers website, and begin writing your story/play/poems.  We'll meet on Tuesday at my house (2103 Foxtail Dr, Layton) from 1:00-3 or 4 to discuss Bleak House and to have a kick off for our writing.  Bring a laptop if you have one.  It's going to be super fun!

Week of October 12

This week:

Read Bleak House chapters 47-55.
Read and comment on the dialogue assignments on the blog.
Fill out your world building pages and draw a map of a place in your story.
Using the link Felicity (Lacy Smetzer) provided, sign up for nanowrimo and set a word goal for how much you'll write in the month of November.

On Friday, we'll talk about outlining your plot for your novella, so bring your plot brainstorming pages from a couple of weeks ago.

Finally, we settled on November 3 from 1-3ish to have a writing kick-off and the last discussion on Bleak House.  Everyone double check your calendars and let me know for sure that that will work for you.  We can also plan another writing marathon later in November if that's fun for you guys.  Thanks!

Young Writers website

ywp.nanowrimo.org

Go get signed up! :)

I dig my toe awkwardly in the dirt.  “So, ummm, I’m sorry about your mother.”

“Yeah, well, not as sorry as I am.”

“What, it’s a competition now?”

“I didn’t mean that.”

“Well then, what did you mean?”

“Nothing.”

“You must have meant something,” the sarcasm is streaming from my mouth, beyond my control. “Why can’t you just let me say something nice to you?”

“Oh, like how you’re being so nice right now?” Since when did she get to be the sarcastic one in this relationship?

“Just what, exactly, is wrong with you?  Why can’t you just let me be your friend?”

“I just….don’t know.  I don’t know, all right?  I don’t know how to be anything anymore.  My mother didn’t die alone.  She took the Elissa you know with her,” Elissa’s voice began to crack.  “I’m not myself any more, and I’m no good to you or anyone else.”

And suddenly I simply wasn’t frustrated any more.  It didn’t matter that she’d been avoiding me or that she was cranky with me. I just pulled her close to me, holding her tight, letting her sob away all the garbage she’d been holding inside during the weeks since her mother’s death.  How could I have been so quick to be impatient when she needed me most?  Well, I would be there for her now, no matter how prickly she was on the outside.

Dialog that could be from my book

James liked his special training. He could already feel himself getting stronger. His reflexes were getting faster. All in all he thought he was doing well. He saw Prince William approaching.
"Your getting better James," William said. "You should be sufficiently trained in no time!"
"I hope so," James replied. "I don't want to be stuck here forever."
"Am I not a good friend James?"
"Of coarse you are!"
"Well than enjoy the time you have with me while you can," William laughed. "You going to miss me when your gone. Haha!.
"When I'm gone?" James said. "To me it still seems like a big if."
"Have a little confidence in your self my friend!."
"I don't have a choice," James points out. "My family is here as well. If it was just me I would be more relaxed."
"Well, I have no doubt you will be fine"

Dialogue for Film (Cinderella)

(BTW, sorry if this doesn't make any sense! The way that movie scripts are writing is a little weird, just ignore any abbreviations - I'm trying to write in the way I'm supposed to! ;) And if you're familiar how movie scripts are written, this isn't perfect, either! I'm still learning! I like feedback! And if you have a name for the Prince besides Charles, let me know. It's set in the Victorian Era...)

EXT. WOODS ROAD - DAY

ELLA and CHARLES walk side by side. ELLA has a basket on her arm.

CHARLES

And you still haven't told me your name yet. Why so mysterious?

ELLA smiles.

ELLA

And I could ask you the same question. I still don't even know your name.

CHARLES

Guess who I am.

CHARLES smiles, ELLA laughs.

ELLA

Guess?

CHARLES

Yes! By my mannerisms, the way I walk, talk, the way I dress.

ELLA

I will... after you guess about me.This is something I'd like to hear.

They both smile.

CHARLES

I don't know what to think of you!

ELLA laughs

CHARLES (CONT'D)

Well, it's true! You look like a peasant, a servant even! But your mannerisms are so noble. You walk like a princess, and act like one. But you seem to always be doing servitude as if you were a servant!

CHARLES laughs.

CHARLES (CONT'D)

And that is what I don't understand.

They walk in silence for a few seconds. CHARLES smiles.

CHARLES (CONT'D)

And what about I?

ELLA smiles, thinking.

ELLA

I may say the same about you!

CHARLES laughs.

ELLA (CONT'D)

Well, it's true! You act and look like you could be living in the palace! But you dress the same as I. Except not quite as dirty.

They smile.

CHARLES

When will you tell me?

ELLA

Soon... I hope.

I found a short story by Brandon Sanderson that is entirely dialogue. I just thought it was a funny story, and a great example of the power of dialogue: http://brandonsanderson.com/i-hate-dragons/

Quick run-down for this week:

• Chapters 37-46 of Bleak House.
• Read and comment (a positive and a could-be-better) on the character assignments on the blog.
• Write a passage of dialogue that could be used in your upcoming novella.

Also, if Sister Bates changes her class to Thursday, I will still be doing this class on Friday.  We will do 2:30-4:00 at my house again.  Stay tuned to her emails to be sure when/where each class will be.  

Finally, something for you to think about:  President Uchdorf's talk at the General Women's Broadcast was almost entirely a story.  Other than a brief intro at the beginning and a brief testimony at the end, his whole talk consisted of a story.  Why do you think he gave his talk that way?  Leave comments here, and we'll discuss a little bit on Friday.

The Vietnamese Woman at Temple Square

I wrap my shawl protectively over my shoulders as I see a sign that may have directions. It's my first day in Salt Lake, and I think I must have gotten off the bus at the wrong stop. I just followed the crowd and ended up here. I would ask for directions, but I just came from Vietnam and my English is not good enough. I read the sign, understanding enough to know that it just has event dates on it, not directions. It's no use. I just don't know where I am. I linger at the sign, praying for the first time in years that I will find my way.

As I walk away from the sign, I am approached by two young women with name-tags. One of them has a Vietnam flag on her name-tag. They start to speak to me in English, but I say in Vietnamese, "I don't understand." The woman with the Vietnam flag starts to speak to me in Vietnamese. I tell her that I am lost, and she is able to help me. But before we part ways, she asks if I have a moment to come somewhere with them. I say yes; I owe that much to them. They bring me to a place with a lot of copies of a book, all in different languages. They give me the one in Vietnamese. The cover reads, "The Book of Mormon." The Vietnamese girl asks me if I will read it. For some reason, tears fill my eyes as I am filled with an overwhelming emotion. I tell her yes, I will read it. She then helps me find where I'm going and we part ways.

I am able to find my way to the apartment building I was looking for, and my day goes as expected from there. But somehow, I cannot stop thinking of the kindness of the young women, and of the book they gave me. I open it that night.

gullibility

Adnan settled himself on the bench surrounding the flower bed in the middle of Temple Square, oblivious to the beauty surrounding him.  He was here for one reason only, to attract enough attention that people would stop and talk to him, his charm and his turban providing the major tools of his trade.  How these insanely innocent Mormons could bear to let him use their special place to preach his own religion was beyond his understanding, but he would take advantage of it.  Soon enough a small group of women noticed him and smiled.  His greeting invited them to chat a little more, so that in no time, he was explaining how Islam was really so much like what they already believed, just better.  His authoritative voice dominated the conversation, allowing the women little chance to do more than nod or smile, as good women should.  Once again, his friendly outside gave him the opportunity to expound on the way Islam and Christianity should all get along in peace, how if everyone would just give Muslims a chance to explain their beliefs, all would be well.  An invitation to call him for more information and to visit the Masjid Al Noor to learn more soon followed. These women seemed to really believe all he was saying.  He was sure they would want to come learn more of Islam.  As the women walked away, he thought of how gullible they must be to listen to him so intently, right in the heart of their own sacred space.  His attention quickly wandered to the next target of his personal mission to convert the Mormons, and he missed seeing those oh-so-gullible women walk up to the nearest Sister missionaries for a quick hug and chat before entering the Salt Lake Temple.

Guy riding a bike

Mr. Bike sat in his house thinking about when it was time to go to work. It was his first day and he could not remember what time his shift at subway started! He thought it might be 3:30 or maybe 4:00? It was one of those he was sure. He looked at the clock; 2:40. It's probably better to be early than late right? He hopped on to his bike. His car was wreck in a junkyard by now. He had got in a car crash... That was his fault. How was he supposed to pay attention to every stop light? He drove his bike down the road. One good thing about his bike was that it could go through temple square instead of around it. As he was driveing through he saw a bunch of trans sitting down writing. "Wonder what there doing?" he thought. He smiled at a few who were sitting next to each other. He was about to exit when he remembered something. He felt his pocket. And than the others in turn. Dang it! He thought he turned his bike around and went back. 

Writing Assingment

I used all three of my people and kind of connected them together. Hope you like it! 

(1) This is perfect. The sun is shining so bright and everything looks alive. I'm glad I picked today for pictures. I get my big, black, shiny camera out and put it around my neck. It makes me feel confident and important to be walking around temple square with a beautiful goal in mind. I can't wait to get started on my photo shoot of the temple. I stroll around outside, on the lookout for the best angle. The temple is shining brightly and the trees and plants around it are so colorful. I am getting some amazing pictures here. I decide to go around to the other side and see what I can find. I stepped briskly along the beautiful path on this perfect day.

(2) Holding hands, my husband and I stepped into temple square, just like every week. It is so peaceful here. We wandered down the pathway, with no particular place in mind, just enjoying the scenery and the peace we felt here. We saw a confident young man with his glossy, black camera taking some pictures of the temple. I smiled at him and he flashed a smile back. Everything seemed so perfect and simple here, there was a word that fit this perfectly I just couldn't think of it. A young lady passed by. I looked towards her, but she dropped her gaze. She seemed like she was looking for someone and she was in a hurry. It is too bad she could not have taken the time to enjoy the beauty and peace around her. I looked up at my husband who was grinning ear to ear with contentment. He looked down at me a squeezed my hand, happily. That was it, joy. This was a place where you could easily find and feel joy.

(3) Where is he? Its 3:05 I paced nervously back and forth. It's not like him to be late, and I know that he knows where temple square is. It seems like he is here all the time. What is it about this place that he finds so fascinating? I don't see any difference except for the people. All of them are as weird as he is. There is a weird, old couple walking down the footpath, they seem so happy but I can't figure out why. The old lady tried to smile at me, I drop my gaze down at my phone. Why is everyone smiling? Why are there so many people here? Why is Tom not here yet? I look down at my phone once again, 3:07. "What a great day" I think sarcastically. The way I'm acing is probably not the best, but I have reason to be mad...I burned myself this morning while I was curling my hair, I was late to my meeting at work so my boss yelled at me, my car broke down and now Tom is taking forever to meet me here. I got so mad thinking about it that I started thinking faster and faster then I started walking faster and faster...

I was so upset that I slammed right into a guy taking pictures. The force caused him to drop his is expensive camera, which fell to the ground with a crash. I stood there with my mouth wide open. He crumpled to the ground in shock seizing up his precious camera. He turned to me and I prepared for the worst, but instead of yelling at me and telling me to look where I was going he smiled at me. "Brooklyn!" He said standing up to give me a hug. "Tom?" I asked, confused. "I'm so sorry I wasn't on the other side of the temple, I came over here to get some different shots, I should have texted you. Isn't this place amazing?" "Sure," I said, still unsure of what was going on. "Want to see some of the photos I got?" He turned to pick up his camera I had knocked out of his hands. I expected to see it broken into a million pieces, instead, it was the same shiny black camera, in once piece. "Is your camera alright?" I asked, even though it clearly was."Yup!" He said with a smile"just another blessing, isn't it great?" "Yeah..." I said thoughtfully "It really is."

"Shall we go?" my husband asked, turning to me. "Yes, but lets come back soon." I replied. We stood up from the bench we were resting on and started walking towards the gate we came in through. We passed the young man with the camera, he was sitting by the young lady who had seemed to be lost earlier today. She was smiling now and laughing with the young man. She looked up at me with a big smile full of light. I smiled back, for it is amazing how much joy can be sent through a smile.

Twitterpated at Temple Square

"Deep breath. Stay cool. Try not to look nervous. Just smile and laugh and she won't know that you're scared out of your mind."

I kept telling myself these things to console myself and attempt to quiet my racing heart. This was my first date with her, and I REALLY didn't want to screw it up.  

I want to look confident and impressive. Maybe I should take a small backpack so that I look like a diligent student. Yeah, I'll do that. I could even tighten the straps a bit so that my chest sticks out and makes me look ripped! Yes, this will be perfect. 

I walk into temple square with my chin up. I was ready. I look around... She said she would meet me by the north visitors center. Where was she? "It's ok, don't panic, just stand here and look like you know exactly what you're doing." I tell myself. "Remember to look confident."

All of a sudden I turn around and there she is walking right towards me. She waves at me merrily and her shining hair and beaming face melt my confidence into a helpless mush at the bottom of my stomach. 

People Watching: Man with a Dog

I walked through Temple Square. I needed to walk the dog, and there was probably no better place than here to do it. Salt Lake is way too much of a busy place!

There were way too many people wearing nice clothes here. And a lot of young girls with name tags. Sister Missionaries. I knew who they were.

I used to be a Mormon. I'm not sure exactly what happened. Mom and Dad divorced and then it just stopped happening. That was when I was twelve. A while ago. I remember looking at the temple when I was younger and waiting for the day to come when I could finally walk inside those doors. It never happened. I didn't even start doing bapstisms.

I walked by the temple and looked up. It was a beautiful building. No wonder so many Mormons love going there, I thought. I used to want to go there. I read the words on the side. "Holiness to the Lord. The House of the Lord. Built by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints"

That's all I could see. And maybe that's why I came to Temple Square every day to walk my dog! I really do wish to go in there someday, I suppose my pride just won't let me. I slowly walked away. I'd come back here tomorrow.

Wait... why is that girl looking at me?